|
Post by Peanut on May 17, 2020 4:50:21 GMT -5
Maryland mom leaved her children in the car and...goes inside for a manicure. Alternately and anecdotally, a woman in her late 70s who I know went into a neighborhood Wal Mart grocery place (the smaller, grocery store only and not a superstore) for "a quick dash". It was 50 degrees outside, and overcast. She has a small, treasured Boston Terrier who is her baby. That dog goes everywhere they go, or else they don't go. She left the dog in her car, with his car bed, his toy, and water, with the doors locked and the sunroof and windows cracked. By the time she came back to the car, someone left a very nasty note for her on the windshield, complete with "nasty cusswords" and the veiled threat that "I wrote down your license plate". She claimed to only be in the store for about five minutes. The car interior was the same temperature inside as it was when she left, and the dog was laying in his bed, just chilling. Where do you draw the line in these cases?
|
|
mare
Full Member
Posts: 2,517
|
Post by mare on May 17, 2020 5:59:23 GMT -5
I didn't ever leave my kids in the car that I recall. Definitely not to dash into a store or gas station and definitely not for a manicure. Maybe if I forgot something after I had them in their car seats before I left the house? I don't leave my dog in the car mainly because he would have a shit fit if he saw me go in somewhere and wasn't with me. I don't see an issue with leaving a dog in a car if the temperature outside is 50 degrees or less and you are just going to be a few minutes. My mom and stepdad's dog loves to ride in the car. They used to have a farm and the dog went with them a lot to different places. So, since moving back to the city, they take her to the hardware store or wherever if the weather is cool. I'm waiting for the suburbanites to call the cops on them.
|
|
|
Post by alicechalmers on May 17, 2020 8:39:26 GMT -5
People have gotten ridiculous about this shit. Cracked windows on a cool day? The dog is perfectly fine. Get a grip. Running inside the gas station to pay and get milk, the kids are fine. Get a grip. A manicure is not a quick run, though.
|
|
|
Post by GiftOfFlavor on May 17, 2020 8:50:45 GMT -5
I left my dog in the car to drop a package inside the post office the other day. It was about 50 degrees out, clouds and I left the windows all half open (he’s big, no way to fit through). I was in and out in less than 2 min.
I would never ever leave him for the time it takes to get a manicure...
|
|
|
Post by justthinking on May 17, 2020 8:54:06 GMT -5
People have gotten ridiculous about this shit. Cracked windows on a cool day? The dog is perfectly fine. Get a grip. Running inside the gas station to pay and get milk, the kids are fine. Get a grip. A manicure is not a quick run, though. Yeah, an manicure is not at all in the same category as running inside to pay for gas. This reminds me of the debates we used to have about whether it is okay to leave your kid in the car while you put the grocery cart in the cart return. There were people who made the argument, "What if you get hit by a car on your way back and no one knows your kid is in the car?!" Umm...if the kid was in my arms the kid would have been hit too! We are at a day in age where parents are forced to do the mental calculations and debates about whether it is safer to unbuckle her child and take it in with her while she shoves $10 at the cashier or safer to lock the car and run in for 30 seconds. There are so many truly dangerous things to protect our kids from and we don't need to add more stress and anxiety. But running in to pay for gas is way faster than a manicure and manicure mama should have gotten a friend or relative to watch her kids.
|
|
|
Post by mimi on May 17, 2020 10:14:37 GMT -5
Our previous Chihuahua, Beans, loved to go for car/truck rides. (Zig the door was open, he hopped inside). We didn’t take him with us when we went shopping in the city but did take him along for trips to town when we were at the farm. Windows were open a bit & we were back & forth to check on him frequently. (Never when it was hot out though) He was perfectly happy in there & didn’t do the frenzied barking at the window when people walked by. DH often had Beans with him when he would drop me off at work or pick me up. Our current Chihuahua, Cooper, isn’t fond of car/truck rides so he stays back at the farm & doesn’t go for quick rides.
When my kids were little (30-40 years ago), I usually left them in the car while I paid for gas (I could see them & was about 15 ft away) but not for things like shopping. I certainly wouldn’t leave them while I got a manicure. (I had an age range of 12 years between my oldest & youngest so it wasn’t like I was leaving toddlers alone).
I think there needs to be some discretion applied. I wouldn’t leave kids or animals in a hot car for any period of time.
|
|
|
Post by coachgrrl on May 17, 2020 11:13:11 GMT -5
Rarely/Never, until they were school age and could get out by themselves. A 3 month old baby ? Nwih
|
|
|
Post by maurinsky on May 17, 2020 11:33:14 GMT -5
I just couldn't leave them in the car - to be fair, I had one baby at a time, I might have made a different decision if I had kids grouped together.
I have a cat so we don't take her anywhere except the vet, and that is a PROCESS.
|
|
|
Post by Tpatt100 on May 17, 2020 11:34:45 GMT -5
We never did, I was tempted to call the police once because the child was out of their seat and was in the drivers seat pulling on stuff but the mother showed up soon after I noticed.
It’s one of those things where I don’t want to be that person that notices and doesn’t say anything and then you see something bad happened on the news. People generally do not want to get involved though, some people just like to see others get into trouble.
I’ve seen morons park up front of the grocery store in the fire lane, leave the car running and their kids in the back.
|
|
|
Post by deeniereenie on May 17, 2020 11:56:45 GMT -5
I once left my kids in the car to go into a store on the base and pay for a bag of ice... I walked out to see a "concerned citizen" standing by the car, who proceeded to tell me he was tempted to call my husband's supervisor and have his rank stripped. My daughter was 15 at the time ( to be fair, she looked like she was 12), and my son was 7. His jaw dropped when I handed my daughter the keys, and told her she could drive home. She had recently gotten her permit. I was literally inside the store for 2 minutes. If they had been little kids, I maybe could have understood, but they weren't.
Oh, and about the rank thing? My husband was a reservist, (has since retired), and I can assure you they weren't going to strip his rank based on me leaving my kids in the car for 3 minutes to pay for ice.
I have called the police before once when I saw a baby in a car at Wal-Mart, car was parked out in lot, baby in car seat, windows cracked. It was about 80 degrees out. Police came, went into store and found mom, she had a full cart of groceries and was still shopping, she was arrested, dad came to pick baby up.
Husband took a call once for a man in a bar while his 2 kids who were both less than 3 years old were in car. He was also arrested, mom had to leave work from her overnight nursing shift at the hospital to come get them. She was PISSED, as my husband recounts the story.
|
|
|
Post by villanelle on May 17, 2020 14:33:30 GMT -5
For me, on a very mild day a dog with the window cracked (but not large enough that the dog can get out) is perfectly fine. My parents have always done this with their large, chill dogs. Never when it is hot (probably 80* max). Windows well cracked. (An Old English Sheepdog can't escape through 5" of window!).
Likewise, leaving slightly older children in the car for a few minutes. I wouldn't be okay with a 3 month old and a 3 year old. Perhaps to run inside to pay for gas and where you can see the car if there was no line and if they remained in car seats, or some other 60 second errand, but nothing beyond that.
|
|
|
Post by mimi on May 17, 2020 14:59:09 GMT -5
My first 3 kids were all 5 years apart so there was always an older kid there & 20 -30 years ago, most people did it while paying for gas. With the grandkids, I don’t do it but my oldest grandson is now 14, taller than me & looks 16 so I doubt anyone would say anything. (I seldom take them anywhere by myself & if I did, they would probably prefer to come in with me anyway.
I often stay in the truck when DH stops for something quick.
|
|
stl
Full Member
Posts: 633
|
Post by stl on May 19, 2020 16:06:10 GMT -5
I never left mine in the car when they were that young, I either left them home with DH or took them in with me to pay for whatever. I always paid at the pump for gas so didn't have to go inside. And luckily there was a gas station near our house back then that had a drive thru window. If I needed a gallon of milk and didn't feel like dragging the kids in and out of car seats to run into a store for it I'd just go through the drive thru. That place was a life saver, especially when it was raining or snowing.
I can't believe in this day and age how often you see on the news hysterical parents whose cars were stolen from gas stations and convenience stores with the kids inside. Every single time they left the engine running, the doors unlocked and the kids in the car. When will people learn?
|
|
|
Post by nansel on May 19, 2020 17:19:20 GMT -5
My small city didn’t have pay at the pump option when Dd was a baby. I never found it hard to haul Dd out and take her with me, but I only ever had one kid. Much easier for me than people with more kids. I got scolded by an old man once, for leaving my dog alone. It was about 20C (68F) and cloudy, and all the windows were down a couple of inches. I went into a small grocers for milk or something. Wasn’t gone 10 minutes. Old dude said he was “keeping an eye on him” for me. Gee, thanks. I’m sure my German Shepherd appreciated the lookout. The problem with this whole topic is that there aren’t hard and fast rules. Some ages of kids, some dogs, some temperatures are okay. Some are not. Some most(?) people agree on, like babies and toddlers alone is a bad situation, and kids or dogs alone in a car when it’s over 90F is bad, as is leaving your car running. But there are such huge grey areas.
|
|
|
Post by mimi on May 19, 2020 17:34:27 GMT -5
There wasn’t pay at the pump when my kids were little. I don’t think stores/gas stations had debit back then either. I didn’t do it very often either. I always locked my car when I went in to pay. (Still do)
Last spring, we did leave our little dog in the truck by himself for awhile but, we were heading back to the city from the farm so we couldn’t leave him behind, we stopped for a memorial service for a family member, we parked in the shade with windows down about 3 inches (all of them), it was a cool day (below 70F) & we checked on him very frequently. He was fine & seemed to be happy by himself. (No panting, barking or signs of distress)
|
|
|
Post by villanelle on May 19, 2020 21:05:28 GMT -5
My small city didn’t have pay at the pump option when Dd was a baby. I never found it hard to haul Dd out and take her with me, but I only ever had one kid. Much easier for me than people with more kids. I got scolded by an old man once, for leaving my dog alone. It was about 20C (68F) and cloudy, and all the windows were down a couple of inches. I went into a small grocers for milk or something. Wasn’t gone 10 minutes. Old dude said he was “keeping an eye on him” for me. Gee, thanks. I’m sure my German Shepherd appreciated the lookout. The problem with this whole topic is that there aren’t hard and fast rules. Some ages of kids, some dogs, some temperatures are okay. Some are not. Some most(?) people agree on, like babies and toddlers alone is a bad situation, and kids or dogs alone in a car when it’s over 90F is bad, as is leaving your car running. But there are such huge grey areas. On our base in Japan, they have codified exactly when you can leave a child of what age alone. Like "must be 6 to be outside alone with frequent checks from parents... must be 14 to be alone overnight or 16 to be alone overnight supervising siblings". I don't know the details but it was very specific. And of course there were issues because some parents knew or thought they knew their kids were responsible and mature enough for some level of freedom that the rules didn't grant them. And in many cases they were right. But it did help (to some extent, at least, with issues like this.
|
|
|
Post by Mamapalooza on May 20, 2020 23:53:06 GMT -5
I've left my kids in the car, same as I wanted to be left in the car when I was a kid. Who wants to be seen with their mom once they're a certain age? No way I'd leave young kids for any length of time for something like a manicure, that's just dumb. But to run inside to grab a jug or milk or pay for gas or use the ATM? No problem.
|
|
|
Post by Eli on May 21, 2020 10:10:19 GMT -5
People have gotten ridiculous about this shit. Cracked windows on a cool day? The dog is perfectly fine. Get a grip. Running inside the gas station to pay and get milk, the kids are fine. Get a grip. A manicure is not a quick run, though. This.
|
|