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Post by GiftOfFlavor on Apr 19, 2020 16:44:36 GMT -5
Maybe Alan had it right. Maybe he didn’t want to live in a world where no one is allowed to leave their house and no one is allowed to do their job and no one can go anywhere and heaven forbid you try to enjoy yourself. Maybe we should all just resign to the fact that we’re eating and drinking water and breathing but that isn’t really feeling alive.
Maybe he just didn’t want to live in that world. Maybe a lot of people don’t.
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Post by villanelle on Apr 19, 2020 16:44:58 GMT -5
You are becoming increasingly hostile GoF. WtH? These are difficult times. If someone disagrees with me or my choices or my politics they’re welcome to do that. But I would never make snide comments about someone’s personal struggles and try to pass it off as a debate. That’s not really a “civil” thing to do. And if someone wants to do that they can deal with a hostile reaction to it. I really am caring less and less lately what anyone thinks about me or what I do. I’ve also had no less than SEVEN colleagues commit suicide in the last month due to losing their businesses. So. Maybe I’m slightly biased about how many people need to die to keep people from dying. Then maybe it's time to step away from the internet. Because you sound increasingly nonsensical and irrational. Seek out people and conversations that don't make you feel the way that it seems nearly everything here does right now. And I am sure it won't be taken that way, but I mean this is a concerned, helpful way, not insult or condescension intended. YIt's pretty clear you are struggling. And it doesn't seem like posting and reading here is pushing you closer to okay, but actually further from it. Oh, and my basically suggesting, even tongue in check, that being obese should be outlawed, you were doing *exactly* "snide comments about someone’s personal struggles and try to pass it off as a debate. That’s not really a “civil” thing to do.". Which was my entire point, that you clearly missed. To many, many people, being obese is a struggle just like other eating disorders or insecurities. You went after that. So I attempted to point out that what you did was the same as what I did. You didn't like it. Guess what? I'm sure most obese people didn't like it when you did EXACTLY the same thing to them when you started this thread. It was a shitty thing to do. Or, if it wasn't, then what I said wasn't shitty. Can you really not see that the entire concept of this thread was making a snide comment at the expense of many people's personal struggles? I thought that by turning it around and doing the exact same thing to you you might get that. I'm sorry I wasn't more clear. So I'm being clear now. You making this thread about banning obesity is the same as me making a thread about banning disordered eating and plastic surgery. Is that okay? That was my point. I executed it badly, and I'm sorry. And it wasn't okay for me to sink to that level just because a sensitive subject for me was made a mockery of. That doesn't make it okay for me to do the same, and I'm sorry for that.
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Post by GiftOfFlavor on Apr 19, 2020 16:46:52 GMT -5
These are difficult times. If someone disagrees with me or my choices or my politics they’re welcome to do that. But I would never make snide comments about someone’s personal struggles and try to pass it off as a debate. That’s not really a “civil” thing to do. And if someone wants to do that they can deal with a hostile reaction to it. I really am caring less and less lately what anyone thinks about me or what I do. I’ve also had no less than SEVEN colleagues commit suicide in the last month due to losing their businesses. So. Maybe I’m slightly biased about how many people need to die to keep people from dying. Then maybe it's time to step away from the internet. Because you sound increasingly nonsensical and irrational. Seek out people and conversations that don't make you feel the way that it seems nearly everything here does right now. And I am sure it won't be taken that way, but I mean this is a concerned, helpful way, not insult or condescension intended. YIt's pretty clear you are struggling. And it doesn't seem like posting and reading here is pushing you closer to okay, but actually further from it. Oh, and my basically suggesting, even tongue in check, that being obese should be outlawed, you were doing *exactly* "snide comments about someone’s personal struggles and try to pass it off as a debate. That’s not really a “civil” thing to do.". Which was my entire point, that you clearly missed. To many, many people, being obese is a struggle just like other eating disorders or insecurities. You went after that. So I attempted to point out that what you did was the same as what I did. You didn't like it. Guess what? I'm sure most obese people didn't like it when you did EXACTLY the same thing to them when you started this thread. It was a shitty thing to do. Or, if it wasn't, then what I said wasn't shitty. Can you really not see that the entire concept of this thread was making a snide comment at the expense of many people's personal struggles? I thought that by turning it around and doing the exact same thing to you you might get that. I'm sorry I wasn't more clear. So I'm being clear now. You making this thread about banning obesity is the same as me making a thread about banning disordered eating and plastic surgery. Is that okay? I picked the leading cause of death in this country for an example as a debate. I’m sorry if that personally offended you, but that’s what it is. It’s obesity related illness.
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Post by Sprockey on Apr 19, 2020 16:47:13 GMT -5
No. People aren't "acting" that the virus is the only threat.
We are living with threats from all sides.
Getting mad at everyone doesn't really help anything.
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Post by GiftOfFlavor on Apr 19, 2020 16:48:42 GMT -5
No. People aren't "acting" that the virus is the only threat. We are living with threats from all sides. Getting mad at everyone doesn't really help anything. The only person I know who doesn’t have to worry about it any more or be mad any more is Alan and he’s dead now so. Maybe he has the right idea. Live like you’re in jail since no one really has immunity to this and we’re all going to be prisoners in our homes forever or just shoot yourself and get it over with.
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Post by villanelle on Apr 19, 2020 16:50:19 GMT -5
GoF, call your therapist.
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Post by Sprockey on Apr 19, 2020 16:55:51 GMT -5
I'm sorry your friend no longer felt like life was worth living.
I wish no one was struggling... but here we are.
It all sucks. I cry every day. And I am now getting panic attacks which never happened before.
But I'm also trying to stay focused and hopeful. We will get passed this.
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Post by justthinking on Apr 19, 2020 17:06:16 GMT -5
Yes, we are all living through this difficult time. I have had 2 friends parents die of Covid and one of my good friend's daughter was just diagnosed. Over 30k people have died. It's a horrific time. My husband has essentially lost his business and my pay has been cut. I'm being forced to take "vacation" next week. I'm sad, scared & frustrated too. We all are. Maybe take a breath . Or smoke a bong 😄 All better alternatives than attacking people who have been your friends for a long time. My dh goes to work every day and is exposed to the virus at the hospital. If there is another surge in Wisconsin after yesterday's tantrums, and we don't manage to flatten it in time, they will run out of vents. I don't envy the committee which has to decide which patients get vents and which patients don't. I don't envy my dh, whose job will be to comfort the families of those who don't and to try to help keep the staff who has to let a patient die hold themselves together to treat the next patient and the next patient and the one after that and still be practicing medicine five years from now. You know what fun task dh got? He was tasked with formatting an online memorial service "for the inevitability one of our co-workers dies from the virus." Fun times for all of us abound.
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Post by justthinking on Apr 19, 2020 17:08:31 GMT -5
GoF, call your therapist. This
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Post by puppylove on Apr 19, 2020 17:08:35 GMT -5
I’ve been through a couple of horrible times and I’m finding this the most horrible. This despite the fact I live on 33 acres and I’m not stuck in a small space, own my own business which is doing just fine (although there have been stunning changes) and for the moment we have no financial insecurity.
Everyone I know is on edge. Too much uncertainty. No personal contact with extended family. No social activity. Guilt and anxiety if you go grocery shopping. Reading some of my friend’s posts on Facebook have me crying every day.
I just want to give everyone a hug. And I hate hugging people.
GOF, I’m sorry you are struggling so much.
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Post by Sprockey on Apr 19, 2020 17:13:51 GMT -5
Yeah, this is horrifying on every level. I feel bad for my kids, too.
Ugh
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Post by stellarfeller on Apr 19, 2020 17:13:57 GMT -5
We’re all struggling, we’re all hurting. We can only be with our families and friends at a distance. My 85yo father has been in hospital for almost four weeks because he fell and broke his hip, and he can’t come home until he gets more mobility, but he’s had some setbacks due to underlying health issues and I haven’t said this out loud yet but I’m afraid he won’t survive. But I have to stay positive for my mom, who can’t go and visit him in the hospital.
I’m not saying this for sympathy; I’m saying it because we’re all struggling and this is a horrible, awful time and I’m scared.
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Post by Sprockey on Apr 19, 2020 17:16:25 GMT -5
Hugs all around!
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Post by justthinking on Apr 19, 2020 17:16:36 GMT -5
We’re all struggling, we’re all hurting. We can only be with our families and friends at a distance. My 85yo father has been in hospital for almost four weeks because he fell and broke his hip, and he can’t come home until he gets more mobility, but he’s had some setbacks due to underlying health issues and I haven’t said this out loud yet but I’m afraid he won’t survive. But I have to stay positive for my mom, who can’t go and visit him in the hospital. I’m not saying this for sympathy; I’m saying it because we’re all struggling and this is a horrible, awful time and I’m scared. So sorry about your parents stellar. It must be brutal for your mom not to go see him. <3
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Post by stellarfeller on Apr 19, 2020 17:18:09 GMT -5
Thank you, JT ❤️
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Post by GiftOfFlavor on Apr 19, 2020 17:18:24 GMT -5
I’ve been through a couple of horrible times and I’m finding this the most horrible. This despite the fact I live on 33 acres and I’m not stuck in a small space, own my own business which is doing just fine (although there have been stunning changes) and for the moment we have no financial insecurity. Everyone I know is on edge. Too much uncertainty. No personal contact with extended family. No social activity. Guilt and anxiety if you go grocery shopping. Reading some of my friend’s posts on Facebook have me crying every day. I just want to give everyone a hug. And I hate hugging people. GOF, I’m sorry you are struggling so much. I spent 3 hours in my office Thursday draining a massive infection, I had to put in an IV, get the molar out, sew in a drain, which took a while coz I haven’t had to put one in a person in years, but none of the other dentists around are willing to take emergencies coz they’re all too fucking chicken shit to open their door, I did that all to keep someone from having to go to the emergency room. And I had to do it all wearing a fucking hazmat suit and a respirator I can’t breathe in that takes me 30 mins to don and doff every time I go to work. Friday I got a call from the dental board because some fucking Karen driving by saw my car, my assistants car and my patients car parked in my parking lot and called them and accused me of having my office open for regular business. For doing my fucking job. So fuck it all. Fuck Karen for reporting me and now I have to deal with the goddamn dental board. Fuck all the patients with infections - they can just go to the ER and get COVID for all I fucking care. And fuck Alan for taking the easy way out and killing himself. I ask myself every single fucking day of my life if I should’ve died in that boat accident I was in, and you know what? I fucking wish I had. Coz Fuck. This. Shit.
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Post by niccikatie on Apr 19, 2020 17:21:57 GMT -5
GOF - I'm genuinely concerned for your mental health right now. Have you been seeing your BF? Could you get an emergency appt with your therapist?
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Post by niccikatie on Apr 19, 2020 17:25:59 GMT -5
I'm so sorry for all those struggling. This is such a terrible time.
I had an uncle die last Monday and we can't have a funeral, obviously. He died at home, so my my Mom and her sisters were able to visit him and actually be with hm when he died. My Dad had to come and quarantine here while my Mom was around her family. My 15 yo DD who is probably the most low-drama easy-going kid on the planet and she's been dealing with an increase in anxiety which makes me so sad. My DH will be on furlough next week and then re-training in the ICU when he goes back to work. We are lucky as other than the things I've written about we're relatively unscathed. But, it's hard. We get crabby and scared and just wonder when this will all end.
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Post by puppylove on Apr 19, 2020 17:32:37 GMT -5
Dh is newly retired, we had a long, cold winter. And now this.
We are so crabby with each other. It’s getting better now that we can get outside more but I’ve seriously thought of putting a pillow over his face. Two days ago he reorganised the utility room, putting things that I use weekly for the market on shelves I can’t reach. It was all I could do not to call him a fucking idiot. Which would not have helped. But it was a close thing.
I’m clenching my teeth so much I have earaches.
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Post by GiftOfFlavor on Apr 19, 2020 17:37:24 GMT -5
Dh is newly retired, we had a long, cold winter. And now this. We are so crabby with each other. It’s getting better now that we can get outside more but I’ve seriously thought of putting a pillow over his face. Two days ago he reorganised the utility room, putting things that I use weekly for the market on shelves I can’t reach. It was all I could do not to call him a fucking idiot. Which would not have helped. But it was a close thing. I’m clenching my teeth so much I have earaches. I’d help you with your teeth but Karen might call the cops so, sorry. Can’t help. 😂 It’s not just you tho, all my TMJ patients are having a really really painful month.
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